It's kind of funny, I don't know if I would ever call myself the journaling type, but looking at the posts on this blog, and the various posts on facebook by both myself and Natalie, and by golly, I've got a half way decent record of the 46 days spent in the hospital starting just over a year ago.
As you would imagine, hitting the 12 month anniversary of an event that drastically altered my existence has been somewhat emotional. My current outward appearance belies the difficulties of the past year, but inside, I can certainly say that cancer has changed me.
I think for the most part it has changed me for the better. I'm still trying to quantify those changes, and document them for myself in an effort to see that the benefits gained from a brush with ones own mortality are not lost.
Perhaps its the confluence of the season and the one year diagnosis anniversary that has caused me to reflect significantly on the season. I recall that last christmas was spent with poison being infused into my veins, so it was somewhat difficult to get any reflecting done. This reflection has allowed me to gain what I am sure is a limited understanding of the enormous blessings that I've received in my life.
Occasionally people will say hello and ask how I am doing, and I've historically answered, "It's good to be Joe Tibbs" That answer might have been slightly sarcastic, but as I've thought, I've got to say, that it really is good to be Me. Other than the whole cancer twice thing, I'm as healthy as a horse. I've got a great family, a good job that I enjoy, and more friends than I probably deserve. In addition to this, the recovery from the 4 months of receiving chemo has been surprisingly quick.
The first time I underwent treatment 10 years ago, I came out on the other side of chemo weighing 165 pounds, limited feeling in my toes, and requiring a cane to walk without a perpetual faceplant for 6 months. This time, my toes feel great, I can go up stairs without getting winded, and 6 months after treatment I was able to go on a 40 mile bikeride up a big hill that certainly wasn't designed with the cyclist in mind (hills are not the friend of those of us carrying additional baggage). I'm grateful for that.
I'm grateful that I get to spend this Christmas holiday in my house, and not in my hospital bed.
I'm grateful for good friends who showed such amazing support for me and my family during an incredibly difficult time.
I'm grateful for an amazing wife who kept everything going when I was only focused on getting better.
I'm grateful for amazing doctors, nurses, and other medical professionals who made cancer II easier than cancer I.
As perverse as it seems, I'm even grateful that I have to shovel my own sidewalk after the recent snowstorm.
I suppose the logical extension of this feeling of gratitude is a sense of responsibility to try to contribute in some small way to humanity, to try and pay back some of the blessings that I've received. I recognize that I will never be able to come close to compensate for the things that I have, but I think I'd be remiss if I didn't at least try.
Along these lines, Natalie and I chatted some months ago about maybe doing something to support the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. LLS is one of the major cancer related charitable organizations in the world whose mission is literally to find a cure "for Leukemia, lymphoma, Hodgkin's disease, and myeloma, and improve the quality of life of patients and their families". Not only is the Leukemia and Lymphoma societies one of the most effectively run cancer charities in the country, I was the direct beneficiary of their programs and services.
One of the major differences between cancer I and cancer II was the addition of a drug called Rituxan. It was one of the first drugs that I received in the most recent treatment, and was amazing in it's effectiveness. The research that led to the development of this amazing pharmaceutical was funded by funds raised by LLS. I certainly feel slightly indebted.
So with this indebtedness, we thought that we might get a team together to participate in Light the Night, a festival like fundraising activity that takes place in late summer. Plenty of time to plan right? Imagine our surprise when at our last clinic visit we were asked if I'd be willing to participate in the Man and Women of the Year Competition. This is one of the three major fundraising campaigns put on by LLS, and involves various individuals in the community being nominated to be the Man or Woman of the year. During a 10 week period candidates work to raise as much money as they possibly can, with each dollar raised counting as a vote.
Now, I'm not sure I have much interest in the title of Man of the Year, or that I'm particularly good at asking people to donate things, but I'm certainly passionate about cancer treatment, and to the extent that my work might help someone who is diagnosed with this disease in the future be able to cope more effectively, or have a treatment that works better, I'm all in.
So, friends, I formally announce that I've accepted the nomination to be the 2014 Leukemia and Lymphoma Society-Utah Chapter Man of the year. I've committed to work to raise as much as I can in the fight against these horrible diseases. The campaign won't actually start until February 11th, but I think it's a really good idea to start thinking and organizing now so I can be as effective in those 10 weeks as I can.
One of the other ways that cancer II was so much better than cancer I, was that cancer II was treated using a team approach. It was amazing what was accomplished when a team of impressive people worked together to accomplish a task. I think the same principle applies to the MWOY campaign.
If any of you have any inclination to help me in these fundraising efforts, please, please, please, let me know. I certainly will need all the help I can get.
Here is some information on LLS.
Here is some information on the Man &Woman of the Year Campaign
Over the next few weeks, I'll be working to identify people who will be willing to be on my fundraising team. If you have the inclination, I'd greatly appreciate your support and involvement.
